Heidi’s book of meaning

‘The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People’ by Stephen R. Covey.

Cover image of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People featured in Heidi's Book of Meaning

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As a psychologist and leadership coach, I am deeply fascinated by personal development. One particularly valuable book is “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” by Stephen R. Covey. This book describes 7 habits for effectiveness in (self-)leadership. Embracing and applying these 7 habits or principles has radically changed my life and the lives of my clients. By applying the 7 principles, I live with much more presence. In my coaching sessions, I often explain one or more of these principles, and I notice that it is often a real eye-opener for my clients, despite their seasoned leadership experience.

I’d love to guide you through these 7 habits:

1. Be Proactive

Take responsibility for your own life. Instead of reacting to external circumstances, choose consciously how you respond. This means focusing on things within your circle of influence rather than only on what lies outside your control (the circle of concern). When clients complain in a coaching session about the behavior of their team members, I often ask: “What can you do to engage with your team differently?”

2. Begin with the Ending in Mind

Have a clear picture of your end goals, both short and long term. This means living according to your core values and principles, and aligning your actions with your desired outcomes. Covey provides a somewhat macabre example here: imagine you are at your own funeral. What would you want people to say about you? How would you want to be remembered? I often ask my clients these questions, and I personally do this reflection exercise every year.

3. Put First Things First

Focus on what truly matters instead of just urgent tasks. Covey introduces the Time Management Matrix, which distinguishes between important and urgent tasks. Effective people spend most of their time on important but not urgent matters such as strategy, relationships, and personal growth. This habit is often a major eye-opener for my clients—senior leaders who tend to get swept up in the day to day.

4. Think Win-Win

Effective collaboration and relationships are based on mutual benefit. This means looking for solutions where both parties win, rather than approaching situations with a competitive or self-centered mindset.

5. Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood

Listen with the intent to truly understand (empathic listening) rather than just reacting or pushing your own viewpoint. This strengthens relationships and improves communication. I’ll never forget coaching a Country Manager to become a more active listener. A few months later, he called me and said I had saved his marriage—an outcome of his growth in active listening…

6. Synergize

Collaborate effectively by leveraging the power of differences. This means valuing diversity in perspectives and seeking innovative solutions that are better than what individuals could come up with on their own.

7. Sharpen the Saw

Continue to invest in yourself in four areas: physical (health), mental (knowledge and intellect), social/emotional (relationships), and spiritual (purpose). This prevents burnout and supports ongoing growth.

I challenge you to integrate these 7 habits into your life and observe the impact on yourself and those around you. Good luck!